Three announce teams again as we come to you live from the legendary Madison Square Garden in beautiful New York, New York.
First up is Cole and Coach commentating over a "career threatening" match between Ric Flair and MVP. MVP dominates the entire match. Coach is entirely useless on commentary, Cole is calling the entire match alone. There's a botched three count but the match is restarted. MVP hits a superplex on Ric Flair, which seems like it would just straight up give such an old dude a heart attack. In the end, the Playmaker is reversed into the Figure Four, giving Flair the win and his job.
Vince and Hornswoggle are backstage. Vince is telling Hornswoggle not to trust Finlay when Finlay runs in and Vince tries to cover his tracks.
Mike Adamle is introduced! He claims he saw Flair's first match in the Garden back in the 70s.
Next is a blood feud between Jericho and JBL. After a brawl in and around the ring, Jericho nails JBL with a chair for the DQ. He keeps beating on JBL post-match.
Ashley and Santino interact backstage over Maria's dressing room.
For the World Heavyweight Championship its Edge vs Rey Mysterio. Vickie and the Edgeheads are at ringside. Rey is wearing a cool mask hat to the ring. Edge is bullying Rey and the crowd loves him for it. The ref ejects Ryder and Hawkins for menacing Rey on the outside. Edge works Rey's busted knee. Rey drops the dime on Edge but Vickie pulls the ref out of the ring. Rey then sets Edge up for the six one nine but Vickie gets in the way and eats the move. Edge nails Rey out of the air when he tries for the West Coast Pop. Edge retains. Coach is seriously less than useless on commentary.
Kennedy threatens to end Flair's career backstage, HBK runs in for the save. Hunter and Batista then run in. The five of them square off before Michaels defuses the situation by shilling his shirt.
Next is the Royal Rumble KissCam with Maria! This sucks but Maria's music is really good. Ashley does a run in and asks if Maria wants to pose for Playboy. Santino comes out and says no one wants to see Maria naked and gets some cheap heat. Maria asks the crowd if they want to see her naked. Santino brings out a fat dancing guy? Ashley beats him up.
There's a silly pre-tape Mania gimmick with Kelly Kelly and Mae Young kissing somebody.
Next match is for the WWE Championship between champ Randy Orton and challenger, and Intercontinental Champion, Jeff Hardy. The only two people who have ever held the Intercon and World titles at the same time are the Ultimate Warrior and Triple H. Mike Adamle refers to Jeff Hardy as Jeff Harvey. Orton uses submissions and Hardy uses dives. Its a real shocker of a match. Hardy does an ill-advised plancha suicida. Twist of Fate countered into an RKO out of nowhere, Orton retains.
The "By The Numbers" package plays.
Michael Buffer runs down the rules. Number one is taker, number tweo is Shawn Michaels, number three is Saninto Marella, who eats Sweet Chin Music and is eliminated by taker, number four is Great Khali, who suffers "You can't wrestle" chants and gets eliminated by taker. Number five is Hardcore Holly, number sx is John Morrison, Number seven is Tommy Dream, number eight is Batista, who eliminates Dreamer. Number nine is Hornswoggle who crawls under the ring. Number ten is Chuck Palumbo, who eliminates number eleven, Jamie Noble. Number twelve is CM Punk who eliminates Palumbo. Number thirteen is Cody Rhodes, number fourteen is UMaga who eliminates Holly. Number fifteen is Snitsky, number sixteen is the Miz, number seventeen is Shelton Benjamin who is eliminated immediately via Sweet Chin Music. Number eighteen is Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka and number nineteen is Rowdy Roddy Piper. Punk and Morrison, who are feuding, stop fighting to talk about how cool it is to see Piper and Snuka wrestle for a second before resuming the beating they were putting on each other. Number twenty is Kane who eliminates both Piper and Snuka. Number twenty one is Carlito, twenty two is Mick Foley, number twenty three is Mr. Kennedy. Number twenty four is Big Daddy V. Snitsky is eliminated. Taker is eliminated by Michaels, Kennedy eliminates Taker. Taker leg drops Snitsky out of frustration. Number twenty five is Mark Henry. Hornswoggle eliminates the Miz. Number twenty six is Chavo. Kane eliminates MOrrison. Number twenty seven is Finlay but he jumps the gun to save Hornswoggle from Mark and Vis. He eliminates the little bastard and gets DQd himself for using a shillelagh. Number twenty eight is Elijah Burke. Chavo eliminates Punk. Number twenty eight is Triple H. He eliminates Cody, Viscera, Foley, and Burke. Number thirty is a returning John Cena. No one expected Cena to be back this early and there are fans so excited they jump the barricade. He eliminates Carlito, Chavito, and Henry. Batista eliminates Kennedy and Umaga. Batista and Triple H eliminate Kane. Its left to the Game, the Animal, and John Cena. Hunter eliminates Batista and its just him and Cena brawling. The crowd, by now, has completely turned on Cena. Cena FUs Triple H over the top rope. Your winner of the 2008 Royal Rumble, John Cena.
No comments:
Post a Comment